Tired Old Hack

Plans for the site

Published on May 16, 2015May 16, 2015 by Chris Scullion5 Comments

Well, this has been a lovely wee start.

I launched Tired Old Hack at the end of January and right away my introductory article got a decent response, mainly thanks to my lovely Twitter followers getting on board from the beginning.

Here's how much fun I'm having writing this site: I can put up a crap stock photo of a monkey using a laptop and I couldn't give a fuuuuuck — Here’s how much fun I’m having writing this site: I can put up a crap stock photo of a monkey using a laptop and I couldn’t give a fuuuuuck

Since then, while the quantity of articles hasn’t been as great as I’d have liked – thanks to freelance work and job-hunting, which have to take priority just now – I’ve been happy with the quality and, hopefully, so have you.

While I loved being a paid video games journalist for the best part of nine years, it’s so refreshing to have no limits on deadline, article length, topic of discussion or what have you. I’m having fun slowly building this site and I hope that shines through.

Until now I’ve just been posting articles as ideas pop up in my head, so you’d be forgiven at this stage for wondering just what exactly it is this site is supposed to be. Is it a news site, a reviews site, a features site?

In truth, it’s whatever I feel it is each day. I’m not fussed about having a structure at this early stage in the site’s life and I’m enjoying that freedom.

That said, I do feel it’s worth letting you know the sort of content you can expect on Tired Old Hack in the coming months, so you’ve at least got an idea of my short-term plans for the site. Continue reading “Plans for the site” →

Guest article: Caitlin remembers

Published on May 15, 2015May 15, 2015 by Chris Scullion1 Comment

Last week Tired Old Hack got all sentimental, kicking off with my article ‘I remember‘, in which I shared some of my childhood gaming memories in a manner designed to aim directly at your delicate heartstrings and give them a bloody good tugging.

This then spawned ‘You remember‘, a follow-up article in which I invited readers to share their own memories, which it turns out were similarly lovely and awww-inspiring (see what I did there?).

We aren’t quite done with the nostalgia though. One reader, my lovely chum Caitlin, didn’t just deliver a few paragraphs of memories: she dumped an entire bastard Word document in my inbox.

Normally I’d guiltily cut something like that down to a more manageable size and hope the writer in question didn’t notice (they always do), but as luck would have it I bloody loved Caitlin’s article, so I’ve asked her if it was okay to publish the whole thing in its entirety on the site, all illustrated and that.

Here, then, is the first ever guest article on Tired Old Hack: a lot earlier than I expect to be posting one, but hopefully you’ll agree it’s worth it.

Guest writer: Caitlin (@WantonItalics)

I remember getting a second hand BBC Model B when I was nine. It was already an old platform by the time I got my hands on it, but that just meant it came with tons of games to get into.

I remember never getting anywhere in the text-based Lord Of The Rings game: no matter what direction I went in, the Black Riders would come. On one unprecedented occasion, I found a mithril shirt and got to the stone giants.

Far more interesting was the discovery I made whilst playing Sam. I was carrying nothing, Merry had pumpkin, Pippin had some matches and Frodo, obviously, had the ring. In a fit of pique over the fact Merry wouldn’t give me any more pumpkin, I typed: Continue reading “Guest article: Caitlin remembers” →

You remember

Published on May 11, 2015May 11, 2015 by Chris Scullion3 Comments

Last week I posted ‘I remember’, an article in which I shared some of my gaming memories to show how looking back on them can cheer us up when we’re feeling down.

I had a lovely response to the article – for which I’m massively grateful – and a similarly brilliant response to my request for your own gaming memories. You delivered them by the virtual bucketload.

Here, then, are a selection of memories from Tired Old Hack readers, Twitter followers and friends. We’re all different people and we were all brought up in different situations, but we’re all united by the warm feeling we get when we think back to when video games made us happy.

I remember my old man coming home with a rubber keyboard Speccy in an old Tesco bag that he hadn’t told us he was buying. The whole family crowded round our huge CRT TV in total amazement at what we were seeing. I can still remember being in total awe of the graphics in Pajamarama and playing that and School Daze endlessly even though I was rubbish at both of them.

I remember visiting the Golden Goose arcade and the very start of the peir in Llandudno. Rightly or wrongly it was always the highlight of visiting my grandparents and I was introduced to so many games that turned out to be genre-defining classics, although I didn’t realise it at the time.

One time a guy asked if he could join my game of Golden Axe and when I said “sure thing” he proceeded to kick the the life right out of me, before my 10-year-old eyes. I was too busy laughing at his audacity to be angry and mourn the loss of my precious 10p. We ended up gaming together for an hour or so until Thunderblade had swallowed the last of the week’s spends.

You’re right, gaming gives us all memories that we can look back on fondly as well as providing a fantastic distraction from the heaps of actual manure that comes along with adult life.

Your article got me thinking and I’m so grateful for my old man introducing me to computers at such a young age (Vic-20 era) even though he had little interest in them himself. It was that spark that started a lifelong passion for gaming that doesn’t seem to be dimming at all.

Having the opportunity to see games develop from Radar Rat Race to Grand Theft Auto V is a journey that not everyone had the chance to experience. Watching these games evolve over my 37 years on this planet has been such a special experience and not every generation gets to witness something like that.

– Pastebutty Continue reading “You remember” →

I remember

Published on May 8, 2015May 8, 2015 by Chris Scullion19 Comments

I remember being extremely young, maybe three or four, and playing Dangermouse In The Black Forest Chateau with my dad on his ZX Spectrum 48K. It was a text adventure and he’d read it out to me like a story and I’d tell him what I wanted to do.

I have very few memories of being so young but for some reason this one sticks out. Being unable to read at the time, it’s the only vivid memory I have of seeing weird symbols (the words on the screen) and somehow knowing they meant something, but not knowing what. Continue reading “I remember” →

My first Miyamoto interview from 2007

Published on April 23, 2015April 23, 2015 by Chris Scullion3 Comments

I’ve interviewed a number of game developers and other personalities over the years. Of them all, two stand out as personal favourites: Suda 51 and Shigeru Miyamoto.

I’ll cover my first Suda 51 interview in a later article, but for now let me focus on Miyamoto.

Me and Miyamoto — Plot twist: I was wearing trousers, he wasn’t

If you’ve got any sort of gaming knowledge, you know that Miyamoto is, quite simply, the man. If you don’t have any sort of gaming knowledge, I think you’ve ended up here by mistake, probably because you were searching for “Emma Watson upskirt” and Google brought you here because of this sentence. In which case stick around, you sick bastard, you might learn something.

Miyamoto is the single most influential video game creator and developer of all time. People will argue with this. Those people are wrong. Don’t fight them, pity them.

I’ve actually interviewed Miyamoto twice, and both were special for different reasons. The second time was in person, and led to the photo you see above, so naturally it was special for that reason alone: a one-on-one chat with the man whose work shaped my childhood and, ultimately, my career and life. Continue reading “My first Miyamoto interview from 2007” →

Lego Dimensions: Everything you need to know

Published on April 9, 2015April 9, 2015 by Chris Scullion12 Comments

Believe it or not, I’ve never really been a massive fan of Lego sets.

Don’t get me wrong, I definitely want to be. I absolutely love what it stands for, I adore how timeless the design is, and I enjoy seeing all the different things people make with it.

I’m just not a very creative person when it comes to making things. It’s the same reason I don’t like Minecraft: any time I play it the result is me just standing there going “ummmm…” and never deciding what to make.

The Lego products that interest me most, then, are the pre-set construction kits that give you all the pieces you need in the box and let you build shit like the Millennium Falcon, the Simpsons’ house and even the United Nations headquarters.

Much as I’d love to get stuck into those however, they’re just too pricey. The recently-released SHIELD Helicarrier from their Marvel Super Heroes line is a wallet-squirming £269.99. Smaller things, like the Eiffel Tower, are still £30 a pop: that’s just too much money for me for something I’ll play with (i.e. build) once and never use again.

Most of my relationship with Lego, then, consists of playing the brilliant Lego games from Traveller’s Tales / TT Games. From the original Lego Star Wars all the way up to the recently released Lego Batman 3, I’ve owned all sixteen licensed Lego games and am pumped for the two upcoming offerings, Lego Marvel’s Avengers and Lego Jurassic World.

That’s why the recently announced Lego Dimensions has me so excited. Continue reading “Lego Dimensions: Everything you need to know” →

2K Games has killed the NBA 2K14 servers. Here’s why that’s bullshit

Published on April 6, 2015April 8, 2015 by Chris Scullion16 Comments

(See bottom of the article for an update on the situation)

Jake McPake is dead.

Or rather, his illustrious career is. Right before he was ready to cement his name in NBA basketball history.

Allow me to explain. First, some background info: I absolutely adore the NBA 2K series. That isn’t bluff and bluster either, you only have to check back to literally the last article I posted, where I wrote:

“The best presentation you’ll see in a sports game these days is 2K Sports’ NBA 2K15. This isn’t a new phenomenon, though. The NBA 2K series has been consistently fantastic ever since… well, the year 2K.”

See? I bloody love me some NBA 2K. Even though 2K Sports has been slowly introducing some new features that I’ve been wary of, for now I’ve given it the benefit of the doubt.

That ends now. And it ends because 2K Sports has shut off the NBA 2K14 servers. Continue reading “2K Games has killed the NBA 2K14 servers. Here’s why that’s bullshit” →

The 30 best Dreamcast games

Published on April 3, 2015April 3, 2015 by Chris Scullion16 Comments

This is the third in my ’30 Best’ series of articles in which I discuss my favourite games ever on a system-by-system basis for the first time. In case you missed them, I’ve already covered the 30 best DS games and 30 best GameCube games.

As before, because this is my own personal list and not a collaborative effort for a magazine or website, there will be some glaring omissions of games I simply didn’t play or didn’t like. So yes, I know Legacy Of Kain isn’t on there: stop riding me, dawg.

If one of your favourites isn’t on the list, feel free to give it a shoutout in the comments below (politely though, mind) and tell everyone what it meant to you.

It wasn’t always just Sony, Microsoft and Nintendo competing in the video game hardware race, you know. I mean, obviously you know, I’m just saying that for effect.

Back in the day Sega was a major competitor too, with the Master System and Mega Drive / Genesis shifting in hefty numbers worldwide.

After its fourth standalone console – the overpriced Saturn – crumbled against the Nintendo 64 and newcomer Sony’s game-changing PlayStation, Sega’s next system would either make or break the company’s future.

Sadly, it would end up doing the latter. Continue reading “The 30 best Dreamcast games” →