The fortnight in games: E3 resignations, Kojima’s rant, sweat sensors

In today’s busy times, it’s sometimes difficult to keep on top of all the big gaming news.

Although there are a number of high quality websites out there reporting news on a daily basis, sometimes there just aren’t enough hours in the day to sift through hundreds of articles.

Yer man Scullion is here to help with The Fortnight in Games, a fortnightly (obviously) rundown of the bigger and more interesting stories of the past two weeks.

Every story below contains a link to the wonderful Video Games Chronicle (VGC), the spiritual successor to CVG and the very best place for high quality, well researched daily gaming news (and I’m not just saying that because I write the odd review for them).

If you want to know about any of the stories you see below, clink on their respective links to head to VGC and get significantly more detail. And fewer shit jokes, which is an extra bonus.

If you enjoy this article, let me know and spread the word. If it becomes popular enough I’ll happily do it every fortnight. Now let’s get cracking. Continue reading “The fortnight in games: E3 resignations, Kojima’s rant, sweat sensors”

The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening (Switch) review

Nintendo / Grezzo
Nintendo Switch

links-awakening-switch-boxWhen it comes to the Legend of Zelda series, one game stands out in particular as something of a black horse: a game that defies the normal conventions of the series and introduces a bunch of new ideas.

That game, of course, is Zelda II: The Adventure of Link.

What’s that? You were expecting it to be Link’s Awakening? Nah mate, Zelda II. It’s proper side-scrolling and everything. Give it a go, it’s good.

Anyway, I’m digressing. You’re here to read about the Switch version of Link’s Awakening, so let me cut to the chase: it’s bloody good. Not without its issues, but bloody good nonetheless. Continue reading “The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening (Switch) review”

Gemhunter #15 – Summer Heat Beach Volleyball

Gemhunter hits the 15-episode milestone with a return to the PS2, and this time we’re taking this shit to the beach.

I’m reliably informed that this one is actually called Summer Heat Beach Volleyball, even though the box clearly makes the title look like Beach Volleyball: Summer Heat.

Regardless, this is one of the last games published by Acclaim, which went bankrupt just a year later. Should it be blamed for it, or was it actually a good game? Let’s find out.

 

Gemhunter is my video series in which I try out forgotten, ignored, licensed or shovelware games I’ve never played in the hope of finding a hidden gem. The video is presented unedited so you can experience the game for the first time as I do. Enjoyed this video and want to see more? You can find past Gemhunter episodes here.

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Fire Emblem: Three Houses ‘review’ in progress

Nintendo / Intelligent Systems, Koei Tecmo
Nintendo Switch

fire-emblem-three-houses-coverThere are two genres of console game that strike fear in the heart of reviewers: RPGs and turn-based strategy.

Both tend to take many tens of hours to beat, and given that this inevitably results in a need to ‘take our work home’ with us and commit a large chunk of time to them, the thought of reviewing one fills many with dread.

Yer man Scullion received review code for Fire Emblem: Three Houses about a week ago. Considering it’s not only the latest game in a much-loved turn-based strategy series but also has new features that make it more like an RPG than ever, it’s a lethal cocktail of free time devastation.

The reality, dear reader, is that this game can’t be beaten in a week. Not if you want to play it properly, and also have an adult life with a family and a job. As such, this isn’t a completed review.

After asking my lovely Twitter followers whether I should keep playing and turn in a review late, or just review what I’ve played so far, they showed their commitment to the cause by turning in a reliable 228/228 vote. So I’ve just decided to do the latter.

To make it categorically clear, then: this is not a full review. I have not completed this game. And from what I’ve been told by some peers, there’s a moment something like 40-50 hours in (that I have yet to reach) where shit goes down and everything properly kicks off, so this isn’t even a review of the meat of it.

What it should be, though, is enough to reassure you that Fire Emblem: Three Houses is bloody good, and well worth getting if you’re even slightly interested in the genre. Continue reading “Fire Emblem: Three Houses ‘review’ in progress”

Hands-on with Nintendo’s E3 2019 demos

E3’s all well and good but yer man Scullion can’t be doing with all that hassle. The 13-hour flight to LA would be bad enough, but given my global celebrity status I’m sure I also wouldn’t be able to move for autograph requests, people asking for selfies and offers of marriage.

Thankfully, Nintendo recently invited me to its UK headquarters to spend time with some of its E3 demos, away from all the hustle and bustle of the main show.

Not only that, I was also allowed to record footage for some of the games, meaning below you can see the likes of Link’s Awakening and Luigi’s Mansion 3 in perfect quality as recorded by yours truly.

Here’s my impressions of what I played, along with my videos (including commentary on what you’re seeing) where applicable. Continue reading “Hands-on with Nintendo’s E3 2019 demos”

My Arcade Pixel Player review

With retro gaming all the rage these days, there are plenty of companies keen to appeal to the old-school gamers out there with products that appeal to their childhoods.

California-based My Arcade is one such outfit looking to tap into that vein with its Pixel Player gizmo, but it’s gone one step further by securing something others often fail to acquire: an official licence.

Whereas most of these retro handheld thingies tend to chuck a bunch of unofficial, homebrew and bootleg games on there and slap a price on it, My Arcade has teamed up with Data East to include eight of its classic games on the system.

Granted, it does still have said unofficial, homebrew and bootleg games on there too – there are 308 games in total – but at least you know there are some legit offerings.

Just to clarify before we get into more depth, we’re talking NES emulation here. Although most of the Data East games included in the Pixel Player had arcade versions, it’s the ports released on Nintendo’s 8-bit system that you’ll find instead.

That said, let’s break it down a bit more. Continue reading “My Arcade Pixel Player review”

Kartography #5 – Team Sonic Racing

Kartography is my regular series in which I look at licensed kart racers throughout gaming history, and figure out where they fit on my all-time karting game leaderboard.

For more information on my scoring policy for Kartography, check out this introductory article.

Sega / Sumo Digital
PS4, Xbox One, Switch, PC (PS4 version reviewed)

My last Kartography article looked at Sonic R, Sonic’s debut home console racing experience.

Given that today marks the launch of the latest one – Team Sonic Racing – it only makes sense that a Kartography double-bill is in order.

Thanks to Sega, yer man Scullion has been playing the PS4 Pro version of the game for the past week and a half, which is just enough time to deconstruct the entire thing in trademark Kartography style.

In case you aren’t aware, Team Sonic Racing’s main gimmick is team races, where you’re grouped together with two other partners and your Grand Prix points are all added up for a total score.

Where will this new twist place it on my Kartography leaderboard though? Let’s find out. Continue reading “Kartography #5 – Team Sonic Racing”

TOH Game Club 3 – Earthbound

First, there was Zelda II. Then there was StarTropics. Now it’s time to go 16-bit.

The success of the first two Tired Old Hack Game Clubs meant it was only a matter of time before we did it all over again. That time is now, though I suppose that should already be obvious by this point. I mean, you knew what you were clicking.

Um… let’s go.


The idea

In case you missed the first two, the Tired Old Hack Game Club is a new group in which, for a month at a time, like-minded gamers can play through retro games together.

Instead of trying to decipher a potentially troublesome retro game and figure out what makes it tick by wading your way through terrible online FAQs written by 13-year-old amateur comedians, you’ll instead be able to take comfort in the fact that a bunch of other folk are also playing through the same game as you, and you’ll be able to talk to them about it.

Stuck in a particular area? Struggling to get to grips with the game’s mechanics? Found a particularly cool trick and want to share it? Have you drawn your own map to help you get through a dungeon, and you want to proudly offer it to others to help them? This is for you.

Each month yer man Scullion will pick a retro game for everyone to play together. These will almost always be games that are easy to get hold of and affordable: I’m not going to ask you to buy an Atari Jaguar and drop £80 on Alien vs Predator or anything like that. Ideally, nothing in the Game Club will cost more than £10.

Anyone wishing to take part in the Game Club will be able to join the discussion on the Tired Old Hack Discord server. If you haven’t already joined or are new to Discord, it’s essentially just a chat room with various channels: the Tired Old Hack one has channels dedicated to the site itself, Nintendo games, Xbox games, PlayStation games, retro gaming, off-topic and the likes.

As of right this bloody moment, the Tired Old Hack Discord server now has a shiny new channel called #game-club – this is where all your Game Club discussions can take place.

If you’re interested, then, follow this link to sign up to the Tired Old Hack Discord server, and join in the conversation.

Throughout the month I’ll be jumping in to share little tidbits about the game, and post old magazine articles, be that reviews (so you can see what people thought of it at the time) or tips sections (so you can get help like we did back in the day).

The future of Game Club relies on your participation, really. If only a couple of people do it and there’s no real enthusiasm for it, then I’ll scrap it and chalk it up to experience. If, on the other hand, it results in a lovely wee community of like-minded gamers discovering classic games for the first time together, then it’ll continue for as long as possible.

That said, sign up to the Discord if you’re interested and let’s get cracking! This month’s game is:


Earthbound

SNES, 1994
Nintendo / HAL Laboratory, Ape Inc.

By the early ’90s, the vast majority of gamers associated RPGs with fantasy settings.

They were almost always about knights, mages, princesses, dungeons, dragons and all the stuff people still moan about these days any time HBO decides to make TV shows based on them.

Earthbound – written by Shigesato Itoi and programmed by the late Satoru Iwata – messed with this tradition by placing an RPG story in a modern day setting, and replacing the wizards and assassins with 9-year-old children.

Earthbound was only released in Japan (as Mother 2) and North America during the SNES era: European gamers didn’t get it until nearly two decades later, when it launched on the Wii U Virtual Console in 2013.

How to get it

There are a few ways to get Earthbound if you fancy taking part in this month’s Game Club.

• It’s one of the 30 games on the SNES Classic mini console.

• You can get it on the Wii U eShop for £6.99 / $9.99.

• You can get it on the New 3DS eShop for £8.99 / $9.99 (only if you have a New 3DS model).

• Finally, if you’re dodgy, you can obviously also run it on an SNES emulator.

Starting out

Earthbound is a fairly typical example of a mid ’90s RPG, so if you aren’t familiar with that genre it may take you a little while to get used to its start-stop flow.

In fact, if that’s the case you’re going to have a more authentic experience: when Earthbound launched in the US, many gamers of that era were in the same boat because the RPG genre was still struggling to find the massive fanbase it had in Japan.

To make up for this and make sure players were able to get to grips with it, Nintendo actually included a huge 130-page strategy guide with the game, which players could consult any time they needed a hint.

Naturally, I’m the generous type, so here’s that entire guide in PDF form:

Earthbound Strategy Guide

Try not to rely on it too much, mind: that guide was designed for complete newcomers to the RPG genre and so it holds their hand through almost the entire game. By all means read the first few pages to get an idea of what’s going on, but reading any more will essentially be the equivalent of playing with a walkthrough. Instead, get involved with your fellow gamers: that’s what Game Club is for, after all.

What I do recommend, though, is the ‘Earthbound at a Glance’ section at the back of the book: this is a really useful guide that explains what every item in the game does.

You should now have enough to get started on your adventure. When you’re ready, hop into the Discord server to begin chatting about it with your new Game Club pals: how are you finding the game so far? Have you discovered any strategies to help you in the early stages? Are you stuck and not sure where to go next?

See you in the chat!

NOTE: One final request. If you’ve already beaten Earthbound and fancy yourself as a bit of an expert, by all means take part in the discussions but please don’t try to become some sort of oracle of knowledge. The point of Game Club is for people who haven’t beaten the game before to experience it together: having someone give them all the answers all the time ruins the fun a bit. Besides, nobody likes a smart-arse.

Kartography #4 – Sonic R

Kartography is my regular series in which I look at licensed kart racers throughout gaming history, and figure out where they fit on my all-time karting game leaderboard.

For more information on my scoring policy for Kartography, check out this introductory article.

Sega / Traveller’s Tales
Sega Saturn, PC (Saturn version reviewed)

Not all karting games feature karts, you know.

While it’s clear that the majority do, it’s perfectly acceptable for a developer to ditch them in favour of something else.

What makes a game part of the karting genre isn’t the fact you’re using karts: it’s the idea of multiple characters – each with distinct personalities – racing against each other, often with items to collect.

After all, when you choose a bikes-only race in Mario Kart Wii, does it suddenly stop being a karting game? Does it balls.

Sonic R on the Sega Saturn was an early advocate of this idea: not only did it ditch the idea of using karts, many of its characters don’t even have vehicles at all, instead choosing to run across the course.

Does it work? Read on and find out. Continue reading “Kartography #4 – Sonic R”

Wee-views: Yoshi’s Crafted World, Dead Or Alive 6, Sega Heroes, Forza Street, Mechstermination Force and Picross special

It’s time for another helping of wee-views! These are ‘wee reviews’ of games that I haven’t gotten round to completing, but have played enough of to at least form a fairly solid opinion.

As ever, please do bear in mind that this means the games covered below could get better or worse near the end. For more detailed explanation of the thought process behind wee-views, check out the original wee-view page. Continue reading “Wee-views: Yoshi’s Crafted World, Dead Or Alive 6, Sega Heroes, Forza Street, Mechstermination Force and Picross special”